Therapist Darlene Lancer suggests seven steps to rebuilding trust with the one you have hurt.
- Listen to her pain.
- Empathize with her.
- Ask what you can do to gain her trust again.
- Change your behaviors.
- Take responsibility for what you have done.
- Express genuine regret.
- Embrace open communication.
The Bible is pro-trust. Paul wrote, “Love believes all things” (1 Corinthians 13:7). But when we breach that trust with our behaviors and dishonesty, that trust can take years to rebuild. Today is a pretty good day to start.
Recovery Step: If you have broken the trust of your spouse with your addictive behaviors, begin to take the steps necessary to rebuild that trust and relationship.
Author: Mark Denison
Mark and Beth Denison, married for 36 years, launched There’s Still Hope as a national movement to call men and women into lives of sexual integrity. Their ministry offers 90-day recovery plans for addicts and one-on-one and group coaching for addicts and their spouses. TSH also produces resources for pastors and churches to confront the porn epidemic that is destroying so many lives.
Dr. Denison was a senior pastor for over 30 years, NBA chaplain, and board chairman at Houston Baptist University three times. With a Master’s Degree in Addiction Recovery, Mark is a certified PSAP and active member of the American Association of Christian Counselors.
Mark has written four books on recovery: Porn in the Pew, 365 Days to Sexual Integrity, A 90-Day Recovery Guide, and 40 Days to Porn-Free Living. His latest book, Jesus on the 12 Steps, will be released later this year.
