“Don’t trust their words; trust their behaviors.”
– Beth Denison
I’ve heard my wife say that a squillion times. If you are the wounded spouse, you need to identify the addict’s smoke screen. Addicts are liars, manipulators, and actors. That doesn’t make us bad people, but it does make us hard to read.
With time, you can learn to recognize the smoke screen. Your addicted spouse will do a head fake. He will divert your attention from his own failings. He’d rather you think you’re crazy than think he’s wrong.
Learn the signs. Watch out for the smoke screen.
Paul said, “Do not lie to each other, since you have taken off your old self with its practices” (Colossians 3:9).
Recovery Step: Knock it off with the smoke screen.
Author: Mark Denison
Mark and Beth Denison, married for 36 years, launched There’s Still Hope as a national movement to call men and women into lives of sexual integrity. Their ministry offers 90-day recovery plans for addicts and one-on-one and group coaching for addicts and their spouses. TSH also produces resources for pastors and churches to confront the porn epidemic that is destroying so many lives.
Dr. Denison was a senior pastor for over 30 years, NBA chaplain, and board chairman at Houston Baptist University three times. With a Master’s Degree in Addiction Recovery, Mark is a certified PSAP and active member of the American Association of Christian Counselors.
Mark has written four books on recovery: Porn in the Pew, 365 Days to Sexual Integrity, A 90-Day Recovery Guide, and 40 Days to Porn-Free Living. His latest book, Jesus on the 12 Steps, will be released later this year.
